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Sunday, December 23, 2012

a little update bout those arond me YEAR 3, 1 SEM

assalamualaikum!

okep, though not many people view my page
not many knows about it ( i really doubt it that anyone in my batch knows about it, ~,~)
so! now i am going to write somethng about what have been around for...... er.... starting of the Sem 1???

well i am having partnership with Alyaa Syazana, the MPP of the Fac. Dentistry UiTM.
so! she's a really busy girl. should have expected that she missed out a lot during the class, and everything!
and i am with my mentor mentee group.
we are so close now that i am afraid that my true color of being "manja" will leak out~~~!!! my my.......~~~
you know, we have to move together as a team, and as classmates. being together for about 2-3 mnths now, really teach me their colors, behaviours, and everything.. sometimes, i was so devastated by them that i bear not looking at their faces at all! yes... and sometimes, i feel like they are so lovely that i want to hold their hands,stroke their hairs, sing them lullaby...(huahuahua. ^o^....... so dramatic)
yeah, but it's true.

every thursday, we will go to Hosp. Sg Buloh or Hosp Selayang 
for the medical attachment
u see, once a week class, really put us through lots and lots of pressure
in terms of gaining informal knowledge, surviving on our own in the huge medical institution,  getting annoyed or scolded by any medical officers, specialist, or anything....
we pave our way ourselves. the lectures only covers few topics
but u see, the hospitals got huge collections of diseases, even the minor2 cases ones.
in the library, and are having discussion about the case Alyaa(red shirt) will be presenting to the cardiologist
me?? not in the photo lah.
i took this picture that day.

hence, we made our way ourselves.
learn about the diseases, ourselves!
with not-to-be-so-proud-of knowledge of basic sciences during Year 1 and Year 2, 
with head full of patients' numbers to call for appointments the next days,
we struggle to learn the medical part, ourselves!
but yes.... there are specialist to guide us, only during the bed-side teaching

somemore......
i have manage to do proper scaling.... ^-^' 
when everyone had start-off with proper restoration already..
haha..
at least, i have opened 3 cases but not proceed treatment yet..
haha (what have i done~!~!~! why am i so slow....~~~)

i have done periodontal charting
with my own classmate in secondary school.
now, i am afraid if he is having crush on me! (NO~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!) *O*
stop texting me........for no reasons.....

as of my love story
nothing much about it.
i have signed up for Baitul Muslim (MUSLIM FAMILY) for marriage proposal
u know, sort of match-making proposal, under my usrah.
ah. now i am following usrah,
in order to learn more about Islam, and to embrace it even more
to be a better MUSLIMah!
AMIN!!!

and last 2 day, my friend(sort of close one) suggest me a man, that is her fiance's housemate.
she said that this man already plan to get married by next year and 
now working as airplane maintainer at KLIA for Malaysia Airlines.
he is 1-year older than me, and a plain Malay man. 
he has sweet smile, and dark skin. 
enough.

but still,
for me, a marriage at early age, when we are not FULLY ready for it 
will only produce a disastrous marriage.
but why??? can't we try...???

we can try, of course, but don't we all hope for a long lasting marriage? with the one that 
we can hold on with, love with, take care of.
so my answer is, "maybe he will meet someone better than me" 
:)

you. GOOD LUCK. 




Friday, August 31, 2012

my 3rd year as the dental student

Assalamualaikum!
has been quite a while since the last time i post anything on this page of mine.

okeh!let's get to business.

i have started the INTRO. TO CLINIC or ITC
-which is COMPULSORY for dental students before starting the clinical years, before seeing the patients, before this and before that-
last 27/8/2012.
which is also the 8th Syawal 1433H.
so that's saying that we gonna spend our next two weeks of Hari Raya or Eid Mubarak in lectures, demo classes, labs, white coats, gloves, green gowns, mirrors, probes, e-set trays, stock tray, scaling...
you name it!

but despite all
what i really want to write here is that i have my FIRST patient last Wednesday that is 29/8/2012
which is also, of course, my own batch mate!
i was REAAAAALLYYY shaking! 
i was to do the screening of her teeth conditions, record any caries or plaque-if there's any-
and then suddenly when i was softly enjoy the moments
the probe catch on something and the gum start bleeding. 
i mean BLEEDING!

i was like
'OH! what SHOULD i doooo???!!!'
my hand was shaking but i quickly reached for the sterile gauze and cotton wool
and wiped the blood.
lucky me!Alhamdulillah! the blood stopped bleeding and everything became normal again.
but 
i know i was not.
when i was to continue the works
my hands still shaking and i couldn't really properly works after that.

well, not everything is perfect for the first trial.
even Albert Einstein can't make the bulb in one day stand
Mahatma Gandhi can't reach the democracy for India in one day
Dr Sun Yat Sen can't change China in one day
hence
people can't change in one day
at least, i can't
but give me time
i'll try my best
and 
let the time heals everything

also 
i don't know why
what's happening
because for me
one week through ITC
it was like a new world has reached me and i am forced into it
for example, Asian eats rice, suddenly the rice is gone, instead it grows in west world 
the Asian is forced to take wheat and apple for lunch and breakfast.
hm...
pretty hard to adapt eh?
haha...lame example. 

what i mean above is like
all of this time i have been dreaming in my own world
my own colours
my own sky
my own trees
my own birds
all those sort of things.
hence, during the 1st week of ITC, 
i watch new things 
new skills
new people
new skies
and new scenarios

some, i could say, easy for me to adapt
some, need a lot of efforts to pull things together.

and there's one time i was so blurred what to do
i become numb.
i could say that was my first numbness i feel in my heart all my life.
even when my brother who always teased me, almost like everyday, saying 
"you're stupid or student? no....you are stupid, not a student"
i was okay with that
because in some way he was right
in another way......aaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhh!!!

of many years i think i live in this lovely world
that new experience 
i think i managed to see on both views.
i was numb but i don't know how to manage it
because i learn through my eyes and my ears
and i just not getting the learning yet during that time
so i was numb.
and i fled.
because when i don't know the answer to anything, i fled.
like nothing happen, i pretend.
but to be pretentious, it was tiring.
but i don't know how to manage
hence, 
i was stuck.
i am really sorry.
i was really stupid.
but like i said,
that was my first experience
and i am not familiar with it, so i don't really know what to do.
hence what i did what like whining
to my best friend-which is so busy poking a GOAT, at the time i phoned her-
and to my best buddy-my Mom-
during those time,i turned to my Creator, asking help 
at least, i feel calm and soothe
and still manage to smile.
Alhamdulillah.


Monday, May 21, 2012

exam is around the clock
still got many to cover
the events are millions and 
we have to keep up with each one of them
haha
imagine!
and my classmate and i will perform a acapella song for this coming national symposium dental event
this June
and
i am playing ketuk- ketuk baldi
haha!

Rejab is here
insyaAllah, i want to start fasting 
fast with me k!

i am 20 years old
yet i never experience love
used to have someone that was around when i was in trouble
but i could not open the heart for him
now i pray for his happiness with his woman of choice
insyaAllah
will be the best woman for him

i don't want to be like Dena
marry at such young age
but i want to be a mature, charismatic woman
that is successful in her career and life as a woman, wife, mother and 
muslimah.

people ask me this day
why i don't wear purdah?
i was hesitate to answer
i need strength to do that ya Allah
give me the strength
but yet i am not a good girl that passionately
go to mosque everyday
do usrah and everything
i am just a typical girl, really
but i wear big2 hijab to cover my hair and chest 
like what have been instructed to me by Allah

i don't want to disobey Allah
i am afraid to do so since Allah is the very reason i live today
i have everything because of Him
thank you Allah
i love Allah and Muhammad SAW.
<3 <3 <3


Friday, March 9, 2012

some stories

it is 5 minutes before the-day-i-turned-21-in-Hijri-calendar
pass by...
it is Friday 17 Raby` al-THaany 1412 A.H.
some 21 years ago 
the same friday as it was today
i was born...

somehow today my day today is sort of unique 
maybe

i really realized today that i was sort of closed-container people
i will not let anyone get around me
it was hard for me to open up to people
and what's more
i hate it, really 
when people mistreat me
when take me wrongly
when they tell sorts of stories about me
i am thankful sometimes that i hear none of the stories about me
not that i don't care
i want to know nothing about those 
so that i still have my good expressions of them like i used to have
and i want to keep it that way

i know now that i am someone 
people say
'world of her own'
and really i create
a small greenery world of my own
when things got hard on me and i want to continue to smile
head up, walk on and laugh happily
as if nothing is wrong with me

if i want to start crying now and moaning about everything 
i reallly will not know 
when will i stop
how can i stop crying
and yeah
i will try to pull myself together and get better
insyaAllah

Islam then teaches me the right way to channel my
anger 
frustration
sadness
joyness
emptiness
that people sometimes find annoying
that i have no one to share them with
the book of Motivasi Menjadi Wanita Paling Bahagia by Dr 'Aidh Abdullah Al-Qarni
really help me a lot
and i have my prayers
my zikir and my Quran 
i really do become happy that way

like today
i did a mistake and my friends seemed really pissed off with me for that
and my works at the simulation lab seemed got struck
and i really don't wanna cry about those
then i set myself loose and ponder myself with cakes,cookies,kebab,mango juices
and many more
while listening to the zikir along the way to the town
zikir to ease off unhappiness
i find myself again swinging off my tiny shopping bag in my left hand and 
shockingly i was myself happy when i set foot 
to the rehearsal for the event of my faculty tomorrow 
i watched the hilarious Jozan at Maharaja Lawak in my ipod video and
i laughed a lot about that
hahahahahaha


p:s> laugh like him ok! 



Thursday, February 9, 2012

Thai movie 1

just finished
The Crazy Little Thing Called Love,  (สิ่งเล็กๆที่เรียกว่ารัก)
another Thai movie, obviously

what can i say
if you wanna laugh at little2 things, 
funny yet CUTE!
go for this movie
you will not regret it!

it is about a teenage school girl
in love with her senior and 
is doing her best to make him recognize her
in cute way, of course

this movie is not the girly-go-cheesy love relationship
this movie tells about not-so-beautiful girl like most of us (....me, maybe)
can fall in love and strive for it
but in this movie, it is the school scenario
hah....i have missed mine....
but this thing about her 
is that she does her best about her looks
her exams
her social club
that capture my heart when i watch the movie
i really recommend this movie!

5 stars for this movie!

p/s: go for this link... crazy-little-thing-called-love 
^^



Wednesday, February 8, 2012

story of my break-time sem

hm
i would say 
this sem break is the most laziest break i ever have gone through

i only managed to go sight-seeing to only 2-3 places so far
oh! i took few pictures when i go to Pasir Mas Pasar Besar (sort of big market....)
full of many things, really!
and i really enjoyed my day 
walking, strolling the market
and taking pictures here and there
haha
and to cover my 'kejakunan' of my own Kelantan's attraction
i went saying that these pictures are for my work
and you know, the first thing i bought when i got there
is a ring!
a cheap one, with cute carves of leaves and flowers here and there
 for RM3.
haha....
yeah as a sign for people to not flirt with me
but i thought i must have been stood out
that when i walked around
people kept looking at me
staring, i meant.
i am curious, why they did that?
when i think back, 
maybe i should not wear the black cardigan with black scarft and black bagpack
in a sunny working Tuesday
hahahaha...
what a mistake!

and also i went to KB Mall
but it was for buying some books with the book cash-tickets
Malaysia's government generously gives to each of us students
worth RM 200
i found the book of Rasul Mulia, Umat Mulia, Akhlak Mulia by Telaga Biru Publications!
after a long search...

ok.let's stop here. 
i had few photos to stick here but the usb cabel of my camera
sort of went missing
so there will be none until then.

p/s: the drama i re-watched during the break.
i recommended you all watch Lovers in Paris, a good Cinderella story
but please avoid Full House...that kdrama is ok for few episodes but it become sort of lame when it approaches the ending.... the 2nd hero don't play much roles and spend little time with heroin,
but he said he likes her and wants her to like him??..hah?who will believe that,how he likes her when they only see each other for only couple of time?? hahahaha
 but i like the after-marriage relationship it demonstrates in the drama.and that really make me hooked in the first few episodes of it.
then
i watched Akai Ito.
one of my fav drama so far.
so touching 
and actually i learn about
 'if-you-love-someone-it-doesn't-mean-you-have-to-be-with-that-someone
for mutual happiness
for sometimes you have to be far away from them to keep them at ease and happy
for sometimes our presence bring miserables to their lives'
yeah....
i learned about it there. from Akai Ito, a jdrama and also from Lovers in Paris, a kdrama.
and also i watched Coffee Prince, a kdrama.
a common drama nowadays,
since many productions have made this girl-turn-into-boy sort of drama,
then fall in love with the hero
the hero becomes a headaches
whether to love a man, 
then decide to become their dongsaeng
the truth come out
further heache.
huh....
but this drama is not so much about the status-diifferent the kdaram ALWAYS stress on
i say, how many people is a millionaires 
so why make drama for them? I AM CURIOUS
why can't make the drama about middle-class people
like the indonesia film, LASKAR PELANGI
or maybe jdrama NOBUTA wo PRODUCE
i really love these!!
haha...just a piece of my mind.
peace!







the links of the photos is on the pictures k!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

old things, new to me

it has been awhile since i last wrote any post.

ya Allah, 
i could say no more
it have been 4 days since i started the final semester exams
and i feel rather sick right now
unexplained dizziness
tiredness
headache
nausea
and sometimes feel like vomiting...
but only saliva comes out....
luckily

imagine
i have to do studying but sometime this lightheaded comes in the way
and that'it!
i feel like losing my concentration and i could not push myself anymore
but sleeping sometime solve the problems, sometimes worsen it!

i asked my brother about it and Google it up sometime when the
'I-Could-Not-Stand-This-Anymore' feeling
comes up

these are new to me
and i think this might be due to migraine or something related
i guess so....

hence
i am feeling rather sorry to the friends of mine 
that may feel irritated when i declined their invitations to Seoul Garden Restaurant
for post-exam celebration
i am sorry...
but i really don't feel like going out 
and meeting people

most of the days
this few weeks
i really feel like wanna shut my mouth up 
and lock my self up in the room.
not that i hate meeting people
but sometime
meeting them, talking with them
invite over the lightheaded things again
and i really wanna avoid it...

hm.

since the exam is over today,
and we have one-week holiday
i wanna escape
i wanna board train and enjoy the night.
let it be the little things that can help me forget 
about problems i have

yeah, living here teach me the word
ESCAPISM.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

the world is moving fast

there have been lots of changes
these few days
yeah....new year is here...
the school is gonna opened 
the sem is gonna end soon
and yeah...the final exam...
will be around these few days...

but what i really wanna take the point out here
is not about any of those really
but it is more to the paradigms changes i think Malaysians are moving to
specifically MUSLIMS MALAYS(MM)

i am 20 years old
ans i think is old enough to give out opinion

and in my opinions
many of my friends
which during their teens days are all the bad bad people
turn out good these few years around
i am quite observant and there are few people i have 
observed, quite closely and secretly
showed me some positive changes

they become more humble than before and their attitudes
MasyaAllah ^^
i really fond of them now
and i really pray for them to be istiqomah in what they are doing

some that i observed
already wear purdah...
which i couldn't find the courage in wearing it
i really don't know why
but truthfully
last year, my heart did urges me to do so
but somehow... 
i still not wear the purdah up to this day

another that i observed
already covered their hair and aurat nicely
and completely
Alhamdulillah....
i will always pray for them
they fought bravely in doing so
i am so proud of you
REALLY
hidayah(THE LIGHT) is from Allah SWT
for you to follow His Guidance
and really, you will find no imperfections in His Guidance

some really have started considered Islam in their lives
yeah....life without religion is like the world without the air
really
human are born to embrace religion, specifically ISLAM
people may say lots of things like
when you have religion you can't enjoy the lives
you can't date girls
you can't do crazy crazy things
which are WRONG!!!
in fact having Islam in my live really teach me to be a better person
which enjoy live in more enjoyable beneficial ways
and i really feel fortunate and happy
because when i am sad or happy or under pressure or scare etc etc etc...
i always have Allah with me
insyaAllah ^^
and i know that what i am doing is observed closely by HIM
and i was protected by HIM
i feel immediately in love and the love is so pure i can't say how

indeed i am no ulamak or student that study Syariah, Al-Quran and Hadis at school
but as time moving 
the need of religion grows in me 
and that time i was school-transfered to a boarding school
there, i learnt as much as i want about Islam
and now insyaAllah i am proud to say that
 i am proud to be a MUSLIMAH

and i really want to see people around me embracing Islam
because once you do that you may notice that you get all the things you need
calmness, soothe, energy, all...
and you may see that there are good changes Islam brings to you
you may have better view of life
and your life quality is actually improved!
Islam teaches you to be a good person which do good deeds

hm... i wanna say no more
but i will pray that
we will all be in Allah's Love and Barakah
insyaAllah
.....AMIN.....







Sunday, December 23, 2012

a little update bout those arond me YEAR 3, 1 SEM

assalamualaikum!

okep, though not many people view my page
not many knows about it ( i really doubt it that anyone in my batch knows about it, ~,~)
so! now i am going to write somethng about what have been around for...... er.... starting of the Sem 1???

well i am having partnership with Alyaa Syazana, the MPP of the Fac. Dentistry UiTM.
so! she's a really busy girl. should have expected that she missed out a lot during the class, and everything!
and i am with my mentor mentee group.
we are so close now that i am afraid that my true color of being "manja" will leak out~~~!!! my my.......~~~
you know, we have to move together as a team, and as classmates. being together for about 2-3 mnths now, really teach me their colors, behaviours, and everything.. sometimes, i was so devastated by them that i bear not looking at their faces at all! yes... and sometimes, i feel like they are so lovely that i want to hold their hands,stroke their hairs, sing them lullaby...(huahuahua. ^o^....... so dramatic)
yeah, but it's true.

every thursday, we will go to Hosp. Sg Buloh or Hosp Selayang 
for the medical attachment
u see, once a week class, really put us through lots and lots of pressure
in terms of gaining informal knowledge, surviving on our own in the huge medical institution,  getting annoyed or scolded by any medical officers, specialist, or anything....
we pave our way ourselves. the lectures only covers few topics
but u see, the hospitals got huge collections of diseases, even the minor2 cases ones.
in the library, and are having discussion about the case Alyaa(red shirt) will be presenting to the cardiologist
me?? not in the photo lah.
i took this picture that day.

hence, we made our way ourselves.
learn about the diseases, ourselves!
with not-to-be-so-proud-of knowledge of basic sciences during Year 1 and Year 2, 
with head full of patients' numbers to call for appointments the next days,
we struggle to learn the medical part, ourselves!
but yes.... there are specialist to guide us, only during the bed-side teaching

somemore......
i have manage to do proper scaling.... ^-^' 
when everyone had start-off with proper restoration already..
haha..
at least, i have opened 3 cases but not proceed treatment yet..
haha (what have i done~!~!~! why am i so slow....~~~)

i have done periodontal charting
with my own classmate in secondary school.
now, i am afraid if he is having crush on me! (NO~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!) *O*
stop texting me........for no reasons.....

as of my love story
nothing much about it.
i have signed up for Baitul Muslim (MUSLIM FAMILY) for marriage proposal
u know, sort of match-making proposal, under my usrah.
ah. now i am following usrah,
in order to learn more about Islam, and to embrace it even more
to be a better MUSLIMah!
AMIN!!!

and last 2 day, my friend(sort of close one) suggest me a man, that is her fiance's housemate.
she said that this man already plan to get married by next year and 
now working as airplane maintainer at KLIA for Malaysia Airlines.
he is 1-year older than me, and a plain Malay man. 
he has sweet smile, and dark skin. 
enough.

but still,
for me, a marriage at early age, when we are not FULLY ready for it 
will only produce a disastrous marriage.
but why??? can't we try...???

we can try, of course, but don't we all hope for a long lasting marriage? with the one that 
we can hold on with, love with, take care of.
so my answer is, "maybe he will meet someone better than me" 
:)

you. GOOD LUCK. 




Friday, August 31, 2012

my 3rd year as the dental student

Assalamualaikum!
has been quite a while since the last time i post anything on this page of mine.

okeh!let's get to business.

i have started the INTRO. TO CLINIC or ITC
-which is COMPULSORY for dental students before starting the clinical years, before seeing the patients, before this and before that-
last 27/8/2012.
which is also the 8th Syawal 1433H.
so that's saying that we gonna spend our next two weeks of Hari Raya or Eid Mubarak in lectures, demo classes, labs, white coats, gloves, green gowns, mirrors, probes, e-set trays, stock tray, scaling...
you name it!

but despite all
what i really want to write here is that i have my FIRST patient last Wednesday that is 29/8/2012
which is also, of course, my own batch mate!
i was REAAAAALLYYY shaking! 
i was to do the screening of her teeth conditions, record any caries or plaque-if there's any-
and then suddenly when i was softly enjoy the moments
the probe catch on something and the gum start bleeding. 
i mean BLEEDING!

i was like
'OH! what SHOULD i doooo???!!!'
my hand was shaking but i quickly reached for the sterile gauze and cotton wool
and wiped the blood.
lucky me!Alhamdulillah! the blood stopped bleeding and everything became normal again.
but 
i know i was not.
when i was to continue the works
my hands still shaking and i couldn't really properly works after that.

well, not everything is perfect for the first trial.
even Albert Einstein can't make the bulb in one day stand
Mahatma Gandhi can't reach the democracy for India in one day
Dr Sun Yat Sen can't change China in one day
hence
people can't change in one day
at least, i can't
but give me time
i'll try my best
and 
let the time heals everything

also 
i don't know why
what's happening
because for me
one week through ITC
it was like a new world has reached me and i am forced into it
for example, Asian eats rice, suddenly the rice is gone, instead it grows in west world 
the Asian is forced to take wheat and apple for lunch and breakfast.
hm...
pretty hard to adapt eh?
haha...lame example. 

what i mean above is like
all of this time i have been dreaming in my own world
my own colours
my own sky
my own trees
my own birds
all those sort of things.
hence, during the 1st week of ITC, 
i watch new things 
new skills
new people
new skies
and new scenarios

some, i could say, easy for me to adapt
some, need a lot of efforts to pull things together.

and there's one time i was so blurred what to do
i become numb.
i could say that was my first numbness i feel in my heart all my life.
even when my brother who always teased me, almost like everyday, saying 
"you're stupid or student? no....you are stupid, not a student"
i was okay with that
because in some way he was right
in another way......aaaarrrrrgggghhhhhhhhhh!!!

of many years i think i live in this lovely world
that new experience 
i think i managed to see on both views.
i was numb but i don't know how to manage it
because i learn through my eyes and my ears
and i just not getting the learning yet during that time
so i was numb.
and i fled.
because when i don't know the answer to anything, i fled.
like nothing happen, i pretend.
but to be pretentious, it was tiring.
but i don't know how to manage
hence, 
i was stuck.
i am really sorry.
i was really stupid.
but like i said,
that was my first experience
and i am not familiar with it, so i don't really know what to do.
hence what i did what like whining
to my best friend-which is so busy poking a GOAT, at the time i phoned her-
and to my best buddy-my Mom-
during those time,i turned to my Creator, asking help 
at least, i feel calm and soothe
and still manage to smile.
Alhamdulillah.


Monday, May 21, 2012

exam is around the clock
still got many to cover
the events are millions and 
we have to keep up with each one of them
haha
imagine!
and my classmate and i will perform a acapella song for this coming national symposium dental event
this June
and
i am playing ketuk- ketuk baldi
haha!

Rejab is here
insyaAllah, i want to start fasting 
fast with me k!

i am 20 years old
yet i never experience love
used to have someone that was around when i was in trouble
but i could not open the heart for him
now i pray for his happiness with his woman of choice
insyaAllah
will be the best woman for him

i don't want to be like Dena
marry at such young age
but i want to be a mature, charismatic woman
that is successful in her career and life as a woman, wife, mother and 
muslimah.

people ask me this day
why i don't wear purdah?
i was hesitate to answer
i need strength to do that ya Allah
give me the strength
but yet i am not a good girl that passionately
go to mosque everyday
do usrah and everything
i am just a typical girl, really
but i wear big2 hijab to cover my hair and chest 
like what have been instructed to me by Allah

i don't want to disobey Allah
i am afraid to do so since Allah is the very reason i live today
i have everything because of Him
thank you Allah
i love Allah and Muhammad SAW.
<3 <3 <3


Friday, March 9, 2012

some stories

it is 5 minutes before the-day-i-turned-21-in-Hijri-calendar
pass by...
it is Friday 17 Raby` al-THaany 1412 A.H.
some 21 years ago 
the same friday as it was today
i was born...

somehow today my day today is sort of unique 
maybe

i really realized today that i was sort of closed-container people
i will not let anyone get around me
it was hard for me to open up to people
and what's more
i hate it, really 
when people mistreat me
when take me wrongly
when they tell sorts of stories about me
i am thankful sometimes that i hear none of the stories about me
not that i don't care
i want to know nothing about those 
so that i still have my good expressions of them like i used to have
and i want to keep it that way

i know now that i am someone 
people say
'world of her own'
and really i create
a small greenery world of my own
when things got hard on me and i want to continue to smile
head up, walk on and laugh happily
as if nothing is wrong with me

if i want to start crying now and moaning about everything 
i reallly will not know 
when will i stop
how can i stop crying
and yeah
i will try to pull myself together and get better
insyaAllah

Islam then teaches me the right way to channel my
anger 
frustration
sadness
joyness
emptiness
that people sometimes find annoying
that i have no one to share them with
the book of Motivasi Menjadi Wanita Paling Bahagia by Dr 'Aidh Abdullah Al-Qarni
really help me a lot
and i have my prayers
my zikir and my Quran 
i really do become happy that way

like today
i did a mistake and my friends seemed really pissed off with me for that
and my works at the simulation lab seemed got struck
and i really don't wanna cry about those
then i set myself loose and ponder myself with cakes,cookies,kebab,mango juices
and many more
while listening to the zikir along the way to the town
zikir to ease off unhappiness
i find myself again swinging off my tiny shopping bag in my left hand and 
shockingly i was myself happy when i set foot 
to the rehearsal for the event of my faculty tomorrow 
i watched the hilarious Jozan at Maharaja Lawak in my ipod video and
i laughed a lot about that
hahahahahaha


p:s> laugh like him ok! 



Thursday, February 9, 2012

Thai movie 1

just finished
The Crazy Little Thing Called Love,  (สิ่งเล็กๆที่เรียกว่ารัก)
another Thai movie, obviously

what can i say
if you wanna laugh at little2 things, 
funny yet CUTE!
go for this movie
you will not regret it!

it is about a teenage school girl
in love with her senior and 
is doing her best to make him recognize her
in cute way, of course

this movie is not the girly-go-cheesy love relationship
this movie tells about not-so-beautiful girl like most of us (....me, maybe)
can fall in love and strive for it
but in this movie, it is the school scenario
hah....i have missed mine....
but this thing about her 
is that she does her best about her looks
her exams
her social club
that capture my heart when i watch the movie
i really recommend this movie!

5 stars for this movie!

p/s: go for this link... crazy-little-thing-called-love 
^^



Wednesday, February 8, 2012

story of my break-time sem

hm
i would say 
this sem break is the most laziest break i ever have gone through

i only managed to go sight-seeing to only 2-3 places so far
oh! i took few pictures when i go to Pasir Mas Pasar Besar (sort of big market....)
full of many things, really!
and i really enjoyed my day 
walking, strolling the market
and taking pictures here and there
haha
and to cover my 'kejakunan' of my own Kelantan's attraction
i went saying that these pictures are for my work
and you know, the first thing i bought when i got there
is a ring!
a cheap one, with cute carves of leaves and flowers here and there
 for RM3.
haha....
yeah as a sign for people to not flirt with me
but i thought i must have been stood out
that when i walked around
people kept looking at me
staring, i meant.
i am curious, why they did that?
when i think back, 
maybe i should not wear the black cardigan with black scarft and black bagpack
in a sunny working Tuesday
hahahaha...
what a mistake!

and also i went to KB Mall
but it was for buying some books with the book cash-tickets
Malaysia's government generously gives to each of us students
worth RM 200
i found the book of Rasul Mulia, Umat Mulia, Akhlak Mulia by Telaga Biru Publications!
after a long search...

ok.let's stop here. 
i had few photos to stick here but the usb cabel of my camera
sort of went missing
so there will be none until then.

p/s: the drama i re-watched during the break.
i recommended you all watch Lovers in Paris, a good Cinderella story
but please avoid Full House...that kdrama is ok for few episodes but it become sort of lame when it approaches the ending.... the 2nd hero don't play much roles and spend little time with heroin,
but he said he likes her and wants her to like him??..hah?who will believe that,how he likes her when they only see each other for only couple of time?? hahahaha
 but i like the after-marriage relationship it demonstrates in the drama.and that really make me hooked in the first few episodes of it.
then
i watched Akai Ito.
one of my fav drama so far.
so touching 
and actually i learn about
 'if-you-love-someone-it-doesn't-mean-you-have-to-be-with-that-someone
for mutual happiness
for sometimes you have to be far away from them to keep them at ease and happy
for sometimes our presence bring miserables to their lives'
yeah....
i learned about it there. from Akai Ito, a jdrama and also from Lovers in Paris, a kdrama.
and also i watched Coffee Prince, a kdrama.
a common drama nowadays,
since many productions have made this girl-turn-into-boy sort of drama,
then fall in love with the hero
the hero becomes a headaches
whether to love a man, 
then decide to become their dongsaeng
the truth come out
further heache.
huh....
but this drama is not so much about the status-diifferent the kdaram ALWAYS stress on
i say, how many people is a millionaires 
so why make drama for them? I AM CURIOUS
why can't make the drama about middle-class people
like the indonesia film, LASKAR PELANGI
or maybe jdrama NOBUTA wo PRODUCE
i really love these!!
haha...just a piece of my mind.
peace!







the links of the photos is on the pictures k!

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

old things, new to me

it has been awhile since i last wrote any post.

ya Allah, 
i could say no more
it have been 4 days since i started the final semester exams
and i feel rather sick right now
unexplained dizziness
tiredness
headache
nausea
and sometimes feel like vomiting...
but only saliva comes out....
luckily

imagine
i have to do studying but sometime this lightheaded comes in the way
and that'it!
i feel like losing my concentration and i could not push myself anymore
but sleeping sometime solve the problems, sometimes worsen it!

i asked my brother about it and Google it up sometime when the
'I-Could-Not-Stand-This-Anymore' feeling
comes up

these are new to me
and i think this might be due to migraine or something related
i guess so....

hence
i am feeling rather sorry to the friends of mine 
that may feel irritated when i declined their invitations to Seoul Garden Restaurant
for post-exam celebration
i am sorry...
but i really don't feel like going out 
and meeting people

most of the days
this few weeks
i really feel like wanna shut my mouth up 
and lock my self up in the room.
not that i hate meeting people
but sometime
meeting them, talking with them
invite over the lightheaded things again
and i really wanna avoid it...

hm.

since the exam is over today,
and we have one-week holiday
i wanna escape
i wanna board train and enjoy the night.
let it be the little things that can help me forget 
about problems i have

yeah, living here teach me the word
ESCAPISM.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

the world is moving fast

there have been lots of changes
these few days
yeah....new year is here...
the school is gonna opened 
the sem is gonna end soon
and yeah...the final exam...
will be around these few days...

but what i really wanna take the point out here
is not about any of those really
but it is more to the paradigms changes i think Malaysians are moving to
specifically MUSLIMS MALAYS(MM)

i am 20 years old
ans i think is old enough to give out opinion

and in my opinions
many of my friends
which during their teens days are all the bad bad people
turn out good these few years around
i am quite observant and there are few people i have 
observed, quite closely and secretly
showed me some positive changes

they become more humble than before and their attitudes
MasyaAllah ^^
i really fond of them now
and i really pray for them to be istiqomah in what they are doing

some that i observed
already wear purdah...
which i couldn't find the courage in wearing it
i really don't know why
but truthfully
last year, my heart did urges me to do so
but somehow... 
i still not wear the purdah up to this day

another that i observed
already covered their hair and aurat nicely
and completely
Alhamdulillah....
i will always pray for them
they fought bravely in doing so
i am so proud of you
REALLY
hidayah(THE LIGHT) is from Allah SWT
for you to follow His Guidance
and really, you will find no imperfections in His Guidance

some really have started considered Islam in their lives
yeah....life without religion is like the world without the air
really
human are born to embrace religion, specifically ISLAM
people may say lots of things like
when you have religion you can't enjoy the lives
you can't date girls
you can't do crazy crazy things
which are WRONG!!!
in fact having Islam in my live really teach me to be a better person
which enjoy live in more enjoyable beneficial ways
and i really feel fortunate and happy
because when i am sad or happy or under pressure or scare etc etc etc...
i always have Allah with me
insyaAllah ^^
and i know that what i am doing is observed closely by HIM
and i was protected by HIM
i feel immediately in love and the love is so pure i can't say how

indeed i am no ulamak or student that study Syariah, Al-Quran and Hadis at school
but as time moving 
the need of religion grows in me 
and that time i was school-transfered to a boarding school
there, i learnt as much as i want about Islam
and now insyaAllah i am proud to say that
 i am proud to be a MUSLIMAH

and i really want to see people around me embracing Islam
because once you do that you may notice that you get all the things you need
calmness, soothe, energy, all...
and you may see that there are good changes Islam brings to you
you may have better view of life
and your life quality is actually improved!
Islam teaches you to be a good person which do good deeds

hm... i wanna say no more
but i will pray that
we will all be in Allah's Love and Barakah
insyaAllah
.....AMIN.....